Topsy-turvy
(1)
Muddled
is the word that probably suites Kabir's character the best. He has never been
a rebel but has been nurturing hatred towards fixed canons since his
childhood. He wants to keep things disordered. He either arrives an hour early
or an hour late to the place he is expected to appear. He either disturbs his friends
so much that they get pissed off or doesn't keep contact with them for months.
He will either wish you at 12:30 am on your birthday or will give you belated
birthday wishes the very next day.
Talking about birthday
wishes, Kabir had his 27th birthday celebrated yesterday thanks to his
colleagues at his workplace. He also had a surprise birthday party at his home
last night as some of his childhood friends are still not as unsocial as he is
now-a-days. Even they didn’t know whether this surprise party would make him
happy or not. Whenever you ask him why he is so unsociable, he will give you
hundred reasons why being social is the worst thing that could ever happen to a
person. Yet he loves his family and whatever small circle of friends he has
got.
When the party was about
to end, Arya, one of his friends decided to spill the beans-
“Dude, she got divorced
recently. I hope you don’t mind. I mean, I just wanted you to know…”
“I know.” –Kabir’s
replied in the most casual manner.
“Wait, what? You knew
that Sohini got divorced? And you didn’t bother to tell us. That’s great! You
know this is getting too much, right?” –Hameed was literally bemused.
“Oh shut up! As if you
guys didn’t know! Aren’t you overreacting? All of you arranged this surprise
little party so that you could surprise me with this not-so-important news in
the most dramatic manner. Isn’t it so, guys?” –Kabir seemed to get agitated.
“What do you mean by
not-so-important news? Didn’t you use to love her? Or guess what? You still
love her. You are being so pathetic to hide something you are so passionate
about!” – It was Neha’s turn to get angry on Kabir.
Kabir was about to say
something in reply to Neha’s allegation but decided not to. He knows there
aren’t many people who can understand him. Even though they are his childhood
friends they hardly discern Kabir’s pulses. The party that was so far so good
suddenly had morphed into a forlorn and taciturn gathering.
Flashbacks took Kabir to
the wedding night of Gouri, one of his closest friends. Gouri was introducing
her friends and relatives to each other. Sohini was Gouri’s college friend. All
Kabir could remember that she was looking strikingly beautiful in a yellow
salwar and little ponytail. She impressed Kabir not only with her stunning appearance
but also with her sense of humor. Surprisingly, Kabir still remembers the first
conversation between him and Sohini.
“Don’t you think yellow
is too dull a color to match with the bright personality that you possess?”
–Kabir started the conversion.
“I must say this is too
poor a move to try impressing a woman with bright personality. I believe that
yellow is pretty bright and it suites me.” – Sohini responded smartly.
“At least I’ve made a
move. There is always room for improvement!”
That was the start. They
became good friends. Kabir doesn’t open up to many people, but he did open up
to her. He started sharing with her his thoughts, desires which he never
thought he could share with anyone. No, Kabir did not change. He remained as
weird as always. He just found a person to share his weirdness with.
Kabir was brought back
to reality when his friends started bidding him good night. He could not sleep
yesterday as numerous thoughts started ensuing in his brain. From his childhood
dreams to college life events, even the forgotten incidents were appearing one
by one as Kabir was turning the pages of his memory.
(2)
One fundamental thing
has always remained common in the eventful life of Kabir. Whatever or whoever he
has tried to cling on to, has either failed him in the hour of need miserably
or has forced him to change his mind. He always wanted to be a cricketer but
society taught him that education is of higher priority as it yields quicker. Society
was right. Kabir left his passion behind and studied hard. Now he earns
handsome salary and society praises him. Now he is void of passion and despises
himself for his choice. Kabir never has had anyone whom you can call his best
friend, for in him always lies a veil which helps him suppress his emotions
from everyone, well, almost everyone! Kabir, expectedly, has had terrible
experiences regarding relationships. Everything was going great with Hiya, a
wonderful dancer who was his college friend, till the moment when she discovered
his lifestyle was incompatible with hers.
Jadavpur to Saltlake is
a considerable journey, especially in the morning, when there is rush. It’s
easy to get frustrated sitting inside the bus and viewing never ending traffic jam
ahead. Kabir still remembers the day when he met Sohini for the second time. He
was helped with the fact that Sohini lived at Golpark and used to take the same
office bus to get to office.
That day, he was cursing
Kolkata traffic as much as he could.
“Easy, mate! It’s not
easy to handle traffic when thousands of people are using the same route to get
to offices at same location at the same time!”
-The lady with ponytail
appeared in Brown printed Top and Black stretchable Jeans, staring at Kabir, standing
in front of him, smiling rather in sarcasm!
What a surprise, Kabir
thought. He was surprised he didn’t notice this interesting lady prior to that
day.
“Someone seems to be in
no hurry to get to office” – Kabir was no amateur in making mockery!
“Someone is being smart!
Anyway, I see an empty seat beside you. Can I seat or is it reserved for your
girlfriend?” – Sohini winked at him.
“There you go! Poor, one
tracked mind of yours.”
“I see. Let me guess..” –
She sat beside him without waiting to hear his response. “Are you suffering
from a break up?”
Kabir never thought a
lady could ask him this on their second meeting. Then again, unusual attracts
him.
“No.”
“You’re lying.”
“No I’m not! I have recently
gone through a break up. But I’m not suffering from that!”
“There you are,
pretending to be strong.” – She again winked at him.
They both burst out
laughing. That conversation just fueled their friendship. They used to discuss
on anything and everything, politics to reality shows, culinary skills to
astronomy.
Sohini had a boyfriend. That
meant nothing to Kabir as it didn’t prevent him from sharing his weirdness with
her. There were days when Kabir thought it wouldn’t be bad if he had a
girlfriend like her. Then his timid instincts reminded him of his ill-experiences
with the ones whom he relied on. Plus he was quite sure by then about his
inability to carry a relationship on. It didn’t take long for all to be assured
that Kabir was in love. He didn’t bother to correct them, for he always has had
a gifted power of ignorance.
(3)
Kabir was in office
cafeteria, having lunch. His phone began to ring, much to his surprise, displaying
Gouri’s name on the screen. She hadn’t contacted with him in months.
“Hello, what a surprise.”
–Kabir picked it up.
“Hi, Kabir ! How’s
everything going? I hope I’m not disturbing you.”
“Absolutely not! Tell me
where have you been? How are you?”
“I’m doing well, Kabir.
Listen, I need to tell you something.”
“Yes, sure. Go on.”
“Sohini’s going to get
married.”
“What?”
“Yes. You may not like
the news but..”
“Of course I don’t like
the fact that it’s you, not the person who is going to get married, is
informing me.”
“That’s all you are not
happy about?”
“Yes.” - Kabir said
after few moments of pause.
“Is it really so, Kabir?”
“Why would it be
otherwise? Shouldn’t I be happy when a friend of mine decides to get married?”
“Ok, that’s good. I
thought, I thought you…Anyway take care, right? And meet us sometime, busy bee.
Ok, bye.”
“Bye. You take care too.”
Kabir didn’t know how to
react to this. He was sure he didn’t nurture any feelings towards Sohini. But,
something lacked in admitting he was happy.
Everyone thought that
Kabir would not show up on the wedding day of Sohini. Kabir didn’t only show
up, he did everything that a brother could do on his sister’s wedding, leaving
everyone flabbergasted. But the question is, did Sohini suspect anything? Did
she gaze any weakness of Kabir towards her? More importantly, did she rear any
weakness towards him? Kabir never wanted to know the answers. These are some
questions that he thought, are always better unanswered.
Kabir loved writing. Inside
the gift that he presented Sohini on her wedding night, prevailed four lines-
He smiled at her.
She smiled back at him.
Then they lived happily ever after.
She, with her husband and he, alone, writing about her.
(4)
Kabir woke up late today
with the fatigue of not having sound sleep the last night. He had to prepare himself quickly
for office as he has an important meeting there. No sooner did he get the
office bus from 8B bus stand, his phone started ringing. Kabir presses the red
button appearing on the screen as the number is unknown and he has to prepare
the speech for today’s meeting. After fifteen minutes, his phone starts ringing
again, much to his anguish, displaying the same unknown number on the screen.
This time Kabir decides to pick it up.
“Hello. Who’s this? “-
Kabir seems to be annoyed.
“Belated happy birthday ,
moron.”- The unknown voice uttered. There is a lady on the other side.
Kabir clearly doesn’t recognize
the voice and is in no mood for mischief. It must be one of his friends testing
his patience, he thought.
“Thank you. May I know
the good name of the wisher?”
“Who can behave as weird
as you to wish someone on the very next day of his birthday? Who can understand
your weirdness without asking any questions and consider that you are one of a
kind?”
Kabir clearly feels the
tremble in his hands. He now knows who the caller is. He just doesn’t know why
she has called him to wish on his birthday after so many days.
“Why didn’t you keep in
touch for..”- Kabir is now at loss of words.
“Oh God! How can you be
so poetic? Do you want me to believe you were waiting for me? Were you supposed
to propose me if you’d met me?”
“Somebody hasn’t even
changed a bit.”
“What did you think? Did
you expect me to be morose after divorce? For God’s sake, no! It was not
working.The divorce was mutual and I earn more than enough to run a family.
Need I feel distressed at all?”
“I’m impressed.”
“I’ve always impressed
you.”
“So you are back at
Golpark?”-Kabir wants to change the topic. He has forgotten that he has an
important meeting today at office.
“Yes. But don’t be overjoyed.
When am I getting your birthday treat? “
“Tomorrow?”
“Why not today?”
“Today I have an
important meeting..”
“You’ll always have
meetings. But you will never have the opportunity to date a divorced lady.” –Although
Kabir could not see her, he could feel that she just winked at him.
“Yes I agree. But I need
to be financially stable to continue dating. For that I need my job intact. For
that I need to attend today’s meeting..”
“Ok moron. Ok. Meeting
you at Coffee House today. Let me know when you can meet in the evening. I
guess your meeting isn’t going to continue for the whole day.”
“Yes. Take care. Bye
bye.”
They always used to meet
at Jadavpur Coffee House. Some things never change. Some people never change. Kabir
understands how much he has missed her. Neither he loves her nor he is going to
propose her. He has missed the support that he has always received from her. He
has missed the fresh air that Sohini brings about. The air was confined in a
claustrophobic room for two long years. Now it’s Kabir’s responsibility to let
it blow and get blown.
For the first time in
his life, Kabir felt proud at being muddled and untidy in nature. He would
never have tasted the disentangled joy if his life wasn’t topsy-turvy. He
wouldn’t have felt the fresh air if he were in a relationship with her. For he had let the air pass, it has come back to bewilder him. For the first time, someone
who he has relied on, neither has failed him nor has forced him to change his mind.